If you’re 100% sure your growing business or career is NOT causing ANY issues in your relationships, feel free to skip this post.
BUT, if your progress at work is causing tension at home, if your company focus is causing stress with your family, and if you can feel the fabric of your relationships fraying at the edges, this post might be just what you need today.
Through my years and connections in pastoral ministry, I’ve seen high-performing professionals and business owners lose their families more often than I would have liked.
These were smart, driven people who were successful in their work but kept struggling in their relationships, and it broke my heart because the answer was usually right in front of them.
When I would start digging in to their story, the problem would almost always boil down to one of three things:
A) Their family LIKED them but they never SAW them,
B) their family SAW them but didn’t LIKE them,
C) their family DIDN’T see them and DIDN’T like them, either.
Consider the case of “John”.
John is a first-generation entrepreneur whose father devoted years of time and trust to a reputable company, only to have his retirement dreams vaporized with a couple of high-dollar deals that made millions for the top dogs but left the faithful to fend for themselves.
John decided that he would never put his family’s future in someone else’s hands, so he sank their entire savings into starting his business and put their house up for collateral on a loan.
And he made it all back in record time, and then some.
Now, John is determined not to let success go to his head, and to keep “grinding” until he is 100% sure his family’s future is 100% secure.
So, even though sales are good and the future looks bright, this hard-working, generous, deeply devoted father and husband is out the door by 7:00am and rarely returns before 9:00pm.
Every. Single. Day.
What’s the issue here?
John’s family LIKES him, but never SEES him… and the sad truth is that for most people, that’s simply not a sustainable pattern.
Do you see the irony?
The goal that motivates John to work so hard – the future of his family – is the very thing he’s endangering by refusing to ever slow down.
The sad thing is that since his behavior is largely motivated by one of the most powerful “slave drivers” known to humanity, it’s incredibly hard for him to even SEE the problem, much less DO anything about it.
So, what is this motivating drive that’s causing John to poison the future for the family he loves?
Even more importantly, what’s the SOLUTION for John and his family, where they LIKE him but never SEE him because he’s working all the time…and what’s YOUR solution if you’re in a similar spot?
That’s coming next time.